How to Build Strong Connections That Last
Let’s face it—networking often feels like a race. You meet people at events, exchange business cards or LinkedIn invites, and then move on to the next person. But here’s the thing: real, lasting connections don’t come from collecting a bunch of cards or making small talk at conferences. Strong connections are built on trust, mutual respect, and—most importantly—genuine relationships that go beyond surface-level interactions.
Building meaningful relationships takes time, effort, and a little heart. And while it may feel easier to rush through a conversation or add people to your digital Rolodex, the real value lies in forming strong connections that can support you for years to come—whether it’s in your career, your personal life, or your broader network.
If you’re tired of the endless “networking” that feels like a numbers game, let’s turn that approach around. Here’s how to build real connections that last—connections that are deep, meaningful, and, most importantly, authentic.
1. Start with Genuine Interest
Building a lasting connection begins with something very simple: showing genuine interest in the other person. It sounds basic, but it’s often overlooked. How many times have you walked away from a networking event or meeting thinking, “Well, I didn’t really get to know that person at all”?
If you’re going to form real connections, start by being genuinely curious about the people you meet. Ask them about their passions, what drives them, or what they’re working on. You’d be surprised how much more people are willing to share when they feel you’re truly interested in their story.
And no, I’m not talking about just asking the usual “What do you do?” question. Dive a little deeper. Ask about what excites them in their work, what challenges they face, or what they enjoy doing outside of the office. When you show authentic curiosity, you create a space where a real relationship can begin to form.
Action Tip:
- Instead of the usual “What do you do?” try something like, “What part of your work do you love most?” or “What inspired you to get into your field?”
2. Be Authentic and Let Your Guard Down
Nobody likes a phony. We can all sense when someone’s not being themselves, and it usually doesn’t take long to figure out. If you want to build lasting connections, the best thing you can do is be yourself—the real, unfiltered you.
Being authentic doesn’t mean spilling your life story or oversharing personal details. It just means showing up as you are, without pretending to be someone else or putting on a professional mask. People respond to authenticity. When you’re genuine, people feel comfortable being themselves around you, and this sets the stage for a deeper, more meaningful relationship.
Vulnerability is also a big part of this. You don’t need to go overboard, but being open about your own struggles or challenges can create a stronger bond. It’s through our imperfections that we connect with others, not just through our successes.
Action Tip:
- Try sharing a personal story or experience that’s relevant to your conversation. Let people see the real you—it’ll make the connection feel more authentic.
3. Offer Value First, Expect Nothing in Return
This is where a lot of people get it wrong. Networking often becomes a game of “What can I get from this person?” But the most lasting and meaningful connections are those built on giving—not taking.
Offering value doesn’t always mean a huge gesture. It could be as simple as sharing an article that might help them, connecting them with someone in your network, or offering advice on a topic they’re passionate about. When you offer something without expecting anything in return, it sets the foundation for a stronger, more genuine relationship.
People appreciate when someone genuinely wants to help them, and when you lead with generosity, it makes it easier for the other person to return the favor down the road. The key is to approach these interactions with the mindset that giving is its own reward.
Action Tip:
- After meeting someone new, think of one way you can help them. Whether it’s sending a resource, offering advice, or introducing them to a contact, find a way to give first.
4. Follow Up—But Make It Personal
It’s easy to forget someone after a quick introduction, especially in a world where our inboxes are flooded. But here’s the thing: following up is the moment where a fleeting connection can turn into something real.
But, a generic “It was nice meeting you!” email isn’t enough. If you want to stand out and nurture a real connection, make your follow-up personal. Mention something specific you talked about or a shared experience. If you promised to send an article, do it. If you mentioned you’d connect them with someone in your network, follow through.
A personal follow-up shows that you remember the conversation and care about continuing it. It also lets the other person know that you value the relationship, not just the “networking opportunity.”
Action Tip:
- After meeting someone, send a follow-up message within a day or two. Reference something specific you discussed or offer something of value—whether it’s a resource or just a note of thanks.
5. Be Present—And Put Away Your Phone
Let’s be honest: in today’s world, it’s hard to stay present when you’re constantly surrounded by distractions. But if you’re trying to build meaningful relationships, being fully present in the moment is essential.
Put down your phone, stop checking your email, and give the other person your full attention. Whether you’re talking to someone one-on-one at a conference or having a casual coffee meeting, people can feel when you’re distracted or disengaged. If you really want to connect, show that you value the other person’s time by being there—completely.
Action Tip:
- In any conversation, especially with people you’re trying to connect with on a deeper level, put your phone on silent or away. Show up with your full attention.
6. Patience Pays Off—Don’t Rush It
When you meet someone new and immediately want to fast-track the relationship, it’s easy to get disappointed when it doesn’t happen right away. But remember, strong connections take time.
Think of building relationships like tending to a garden: you plant the seeds, water them, give them sunshine, and with patience, they begin to grow. Rushing things can lead to shallow connections that fizzle out just as quickly as they started. Be patient and give the relationship space to evolve naturally. Trust that it will grow with time and consistent effort.
Action Tip:
- Give each connection time to blossom. Don’t rush or force the process. Check in periodically and see where the relationship goes.
7. Celebrate Their Wins
One of the best ways to strengthen a connection is to genuinely celebrate the other person’s successes. It’s easy to get caught up in our own goals, but when you take a moment to congratulate someone on their achievements—whether it’s a work milestone, a personal victory, or something else—it shows you care about them beyond what they can do for you.
Supporting others in their success is a powerful way to create lasting bonds. Plus, it’s always nice to have someone rooting for you! When you take the time to acknowledge someone’s accomplishments, you make them feel seen, appreciated, and valued.
Action Tip:
- Celebrate the wins, big or small. Whether it’s sending a congratulatory note or taking a moment to acknowledge someone’s achievement, this shows that you care about their success.
8. Be a Problem Solver, Not Just a Networker
At its core, networking is about building relationships that solve problems. Whether it’s offering advice, resources, or a helpful introduction, strong connections are formed when you help others solve challenges.
If you truly want to stand out and create real, lasting bonds, focus on being the person who can help others get ahead—not just someone who asks for favors.
Action Tip:
- When you meet someone, try to think about how you can help them solve a problem or introduce them to someone who can help. Problem-solving creates strong, lasting ties.
Conclusion: Building Connections That Matter
Building strong, lasting connections isn’t about the number of people you know or the LinkedIn endorsements you collect. It’s about quality over quantity. It’s about showing up as your true self, offering value without expecting anything in return, and being patient as the relationship unfolds.
In the end, it’s the deep, genuine connections that will carry you through your career, your life, and all of the challenges and opportunities ahead. So, next time you meet someone new, remember: networking is not a race, it’s a relationship. Build connections that matter, and those relationships will last a lifetime.
